So, what’s it’s going to be: views or loos? Whether you’re an aisle devotee, a window fanatic, will pay for all the leg room or don’t – actually – mind the middle seat, our quiz reveals your true seat destiny… 

Are you that person who wanders coolly to the check-out desk, shows your passport, gets your assigned seat, takes it without question, and drops off into a deep snooze shortly before take-off? Congratulations. I aspire to be like you.

For many of us, choosing a plane seat is more like a mania, a religion. I’ve been known to set my phone alarm for exactly 24 hours before my flight time in order to get on to the airline app, check in and select my ideal seat – the seat that’s going to make or break my flight experience. It’s most important for long haul, of course – when you have certain seat needs or desires, who could go ten or 14 hours in the wrong one? – but I’ll do it for short haul, too.

Here is my list of demands.

A window seat (I’m a slightly anxious flyer, and being able to lean away from the hubbub of the aisle soothes me, not to mention the above-the-clouds views – seeing what’s going on outside during turbulence even gives me a strange sense of control. Close to the front. Ideally in the first 10 rows, but I’ll take the first 20 depending on the size of aircraft and where economy starts. Not only do you tend to be on and off swiftly, with the more organised business travel crowd stowing their stuff efficiently – the trolley also comes to you sooner. On a small plane, an exit row around the middle is the added secret sauce – who could resist a little extra, free legroom? 

Of course, by around 20 seconds into this diatribe on the art of the seat choice, my husband has glazed over, accepted whatever 68F, middle-of-the-middle, by-the-back-loos seat allocated to him by a computer, and fallen asleep during the boarding announcements. He wouldn’t give a moment’s thought to where he might sit while we hurtle through the sky for six hours or more, and I find that fascinating. (Also very attractive, since he’ll take the dreaded middle seat beside me, or swap without complaint.)

While also firmly Team Window Seat, travel writer Justine Gosling has different needs for short European hops and transcontinental routes. “Short haul: window near the front to get me off as quickly as possible; long haul: window at the back, as more likely to be surrounded by empty seats to stretch out on,” she summarises neatly. 

Nick of YouTube channel Nick’s Travel Adventures is Team Aisle. “Aisle always – I’m tall, so I need legroom, and don’t like to bother people to get out for the loo. Near the front is better,” he insists. Writer Jennifer Stavros, meanwhile, has storage in mind. She wants a window seat, “ideally front or middle of the plane”, to “make sure I get an overhead locker.”

Like me, US-based writer Travis Levius could write a sonnet about the joys of a window seat. “I like having access to the views. I’m shielded from people, bags and snack carts bumping into me. And I won’t be bothered to let the middle and window passenger through to the lav.”

Top concerns seemed to be swift boarding, quiet, legroom, access to toilets and the chance of having empty seats next to you. But there is the odd person, the horizontally relaxed anomaly, who simply doesn’t care. These are the easy sleepers, the non-control-freaks. I envy them. But I’ll still always be first online to hit that “Select my seat” button. 

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This article has been tagged Opinion, Culture